This Old House is Like Construction Porn for Men

Growing up, I can remember my father watching This Old House. At that time, Bob Vila was the host of the show, so I'm definitely dating myself here. I thought the show was boring and stale. Why would people want to watch others renovate a house. It made absolutely no sense to me. And my father is not what one would call a handyman. He could fix rudimentary issues around the house by a tool maestro he was not. I've unfortunately inherited that trait from him, and I have also inherited the love of This Old House. Now that I'm an adult, and a homeowner, I see the appeal of the program. It really is like construction porn in that you're watching others build or renovate, and much better than the average person can do these two things. What's even better is the spinoff show, Ask This Old House where small home repairs are demonstrated and wonderful new tools are presented, much in the way that a new toy is presented to a child. And let's be real, most adult men retain a lot of their childhood fascinations and traits. We like to take objects apart and attempt to put them back together. With varying degrees of success; most of those degrees on the lower end of the thermometer. But when a new tool is shown on Ask This Old House, myself and I'm sure many other men begin to salivate at the thought of purchasing that new track saw that was just shown. Another thing that would collect dust in the basement, garage or workshop but doggone it we would be able to say that we own one! I remember my father going through that phase. He brought home a lathe, scroll saw, drill press etc. He did use the lathe and scroll saw for a while and some of the stuff that he created came out okay. But that didn't last very long and soon those too were collecting dust. I guess that makes us tool hoarders but that's not an officially recognized condition with the AMA. Getting back to the show, it's just so cool to watch a master tradesman make repairs around the house. And they make it look so easy, much like two people ending up in bed in adult films. For most guys, women just don't hop in the shower with us. And most men can't wire a new generator hookup. Although it does look relatively easy when done by a licensed electrician with many years of experience, it's something that should not be done by an amateur. So we end up living vicariously through the experts on television and fantasize about using that track saw, routing table, lathe and table saw to make a shoe rack. I know, even my fantasies are boring but a shoe rack comes in very handy with a four person family. Woodworking is something that I would love to get into. It seems like such a manly hobby. I mean, Ron Swanson does it and he's a man's man. This Old House airs locally on Saturday evenings, therefore they know their audience, middle age family men with no life and a tool fetish. On a sidenote, don't purchase any tools without asking your wife. One of the reasons why I need a chaperone when I go to Home Depot. Because when we come home with that new saw, our wives will use it to chop something other than wood.