Growing Older, Or How I Learned to Become My Dad

Like each and every one of us, I never thought that I would get to this point. It hits a person all of a sudden, just like it hit me one day. We can deny it, ignore it, or embrace it. But it will happen: we become our fathers. This is not necessarily a bad thing. My father, who is still around at seventy one years of age, was great to my brother and I growing up. He coached our teams, came to every game and even paid for our high school tuition. Even at the expense of cutting out other purchases that I'm sure he wanted to make. But what I mean in regards to becoming my father are the amalgamation of little things; personal ticks or idiosyncrasies that are passed from one generation to the next. This also comes with a stark realization that makes us question everything. What if our fathers were right? I know, as young children, and especially as teenagers, we believed that we knew everything. Or that we knew better than our parents. Children like to think as their parents as being just created as adults, they never experienced childhood. Somehow to the young adolescent mind this makes sense. It gets even worse when we think how we were conceived by our parents but that's an entirely different topic. But we never think that our fathers basically lived the same experience as us. They had the same emotions, experienced the disappointment of being turned down by their crush, the excitement of high school and the interaction with friends. Maybe it wasn't as ubiquitous because the only images that many of us have of our parents are old black and white photos. When my children grow up they will be able to see videos of me that should have been deleted a long time ago. To the younger version of us, we don't really have a proper way to see our parents when they may have walked a bit more on the wild side. Therefore it never existed, unless in story, which is hardly proof for the young and dumb. Getting back to how I, and I assume many of us, become our fathers; I can recall laughing it off when I received the obligatory "are we heating the outside now" or "your letting all of the cold air out of the fridge." And I definitely went through grated cheese, shampoo, soap and other household staples much faster than should be humanly possible. And I heard about it! But one day, shortly after having children..well...actually when they became old enough to do things on their own, I find myself saying these same exact phrases. Which begs the question, why do children like to leave doors open? Anyway, returning to the topic, I always scold my six your old for wasting food, keeping doors open, not shutting lights off etc. Afterwards I begin to feel a sense of dread creeping over me. I truly have become my father. We all will. Whether in looks or behavior it will happen. Like death and taxes you can't outrun it. But maybe that's not such a bad thing. Especially when we realize that our parents were correct about almost anything. Once in a while you should let them know that. Sure, you'll get the I told you so in retort. Personally, my parents truly enjoy watching their granddaughters torment me. And in a way I deserve it, many ways actually. But to conclude, tell your parents that you now understand and that you love them. It will do a world of good in your relationship with them. Off I go, I believe I see a door open and my daughter pouring grated cheese on the sidewalk.